It has been a summer…

Well I ended up not running. I had to give up the gym.. I also signed up for a 6 week HIIT membership. I only made it to 2 classes.. Work was literally 6 or 7 days a week. I gained 32lbs. This was brutal.

What I sacrificed this spring and summer for work was not worth it.

My family life.. Oh man that destroyed me.

My health. Weight gain. I am now officially the most I have ever weighed in my life

Money. Lots of money. I signed up for 2 races.. I did not go because I was working and no time to train. The running class to run the marathon.. That never happened.. I was running and I was getting faster. Then the time. There was no time.. The HIIT class was alot of money.. But it seriously the hours were supposed to stop… But nope… Brutal.

And family issues.. The kids flat out Sabatoge me. It is so bizarre.. Like limited hours to go. I do not get it. One is 28 yrs old and the other is 17. They do not need me, I guess they do.. And I have never had to work these hours before. Well last June, but it was only for 3 weeks, not months on end like this year.

But I have the training schedule so I will run my marathon next year. I will also be to lose this weight more sanely and slowly now.. I am nervous to take my measurements.

I am going to do my official weigh in, photos and measurements in the morning. I am all in.. Life is always going to get in the way or actually happen. So I need to change my perspective.. I have all the tools to do this and I am all set up and ready to go. My Instagram will be both travel and fitness related.

Oh I also signed up for a class on travel writing. I just need to have something to refocus my attention away from work. And also mostly for my family to be entertained by.

I did just go on a quick trip to Las Vegas with Patrick. It really was for my mental health. 9 days away from work.Yes I felt extremely guilty.. But I really needed the break. I was falling a part from the constant stress. I am afraid to go back to work because it is so bad right now. I love my job and my customers.. This is a transition year.. It will be ok.. I will write about my trip once I get my computer set up though and I can start that class. I am hoping 2 more weeks.. So in the meantime I will be using this blog to whine about my life.

I truly need a new perspective on my life.. That eye opening conversation from the plane home was needed.. I am truly thankful for that. More on that later.. Oh and 109 degrees F. Is way too hot.

I do need a new positive outlook and a new perspective on my life and career..

Finally getting a direction

So I am finally getting a direction on what I want to do.   I have been following several plus size athletes and it is inspiring.  But you can follow and watch from a distance, but that is not taking action.  So this blog is going to be about going from zero action to getting somewhere other than where I am.   I want this to be all about the good, the bad and the ugly but also the beauty of this mess I got myself into.

Last year, I signed up for several running classes and I was exercising regularly at a box gym.   I hit a huge depression, I stopped exercising and gained back all the weight I lost.   Now I just want to get into shape.  SO how did this come about.  Well watching the plus size athletes do their workouts and loving life.   I realized it is okay to be plus size and healthy and be athletic.    This past year, if I had kept with the exercise, then running and my trip to Cabo san Lucas would have been much better.   Work is taking a huge strain on my with all the over time and stress of getting everything done.  I am so overwhelmed.  Also my teen got his drivers permit  Stressful being the passenger OMG.  All of the above of not eating right, not sleeping, stressing out about my job, not exercising, not drinking water.. Ya know the story, it is the same old story.   So I wrote out a bucket list.   Running a marathon, specifically the Athens Marathon has always been on my list and I have been to scared to train.   26.2 miles is a long distance when you are fat and out of shape and no direction.   My goal for this year was to run the Ragnar and the Athens marathon.  BUT you need to actually go run and train to do something like that.   And when you are afraid to be seen and you run super slow well there ya go.  Excuses to not run or walk or exercise or do anything. SO I DID SOMETHING ABOUT IT.

There is a race her in September called the Boundary Bay Marathon.  And I kept seeing an add pop up on Facebook and Instagram for an Endurance training program.  ETP from here on out.  I thought well 23 weeks for the marathon, I can do that.   Bawahahahah.   Well after my 1st and only run so far, 2.y miles around Lake Padden,  I am taking it down to the half marathon.   I can do 13.1 miles and lose weight and do this properly.   And guess what.. I have not run in the last 2 weeks.  Family takes alot of time when they do not want you to succeed.   SO I now have set boundaries and gave my family my schedule.

And my new schedule is what this blog is all about.  Balancing my life.   5:00 am Monday thru Friday I am running for 1 hour. Then be to work between 7:00 am and 7:30 am. Then the gym from 5:00 pm to 6:00 pm as that is the class on Mon and Tues and Thur and Friday.     And then driving with my son after that time.   I got this right?/  Well I Know I can.

So how am I am going to get to my goal.  Baby steps.  I am going to follow the training plan to a T..  Back on track.  Well I was never on track.  Confession here,  I was so awkward on my first and only group run and seeing all the fit people that are runners.  I was the only fat person.  Not old person, there were alot of older people than me. But I was the only fat person.   I am afraid to get on the scale to see how much I have gained, but that is tomorrows revel. Before I go for my run, I am weighing myself and taking a pic for this blog.  My before, or my 1st run and race day…  This is my journey to my 1st half marathon.

There is not really much else.  I am going to be signing up for a few 5ks and 10ks.  I will be signing up for these races by next Friday.

June 1st: Girls on the Run   Lake Padden

June 30th- K2K Race  5K

July 6th (My 53rd Birthday)- Sat Group Run  6 Miles  I figure this will be an awesome way to spend my birthday.

July 27th Ferndale Old Settlers 5K (I signed up for it last year and was too embarrased to run it last year and I am running it this year to get it out of my head.)

August 10th  Race the Reserve 10K in Coupville

Sept 29th  Bellingham Bay Marathon:  Half Marathon

Of course this is all subject to change.   Except for Sept 29th and my birthday run.






Astrological Signs

Mayan Astrological sign..I am a Red Rythmatic Moon

Day sign. Moon. Putifies..Essence is flow.Piwrt of Universal Water…The Quantum Field of All Possibility..


That was fun taking that quiz.

Dressing your Truth.. I am a dynamic hot woman.. DYat 3. Lmao.

Egyptian. Annubius

1st Long Run Today

Well I did it. I ran the distance under an hour. Yess. I had so much anxiety before going outside, in public, on a major roadway. I went with the mantra Coworkers, Family and strangers have my best interest at heart and treat me woth respect and dignity and respect my boundaries.. It calmed me down. I also had to keep reminding myself that I have a 5K May 19th. It kept me going. I am proud of myself for doing this. I am plus size..245.6 lbs as of this morning. So that qualifies me as that. Hence not being a runner and only running for 8 weeks now. And not being able to jog very far without stopping to walk. Yes I am proud of myself. But to be honest, I can not wait until this is my new normal for everyday life. I am looking forward to doing that marathon in Athens with my sister and niece. I also can’t wait until I do my 1st triathlon. It’s weird to think that I am excited about doing all of these. They have been on my list for years.. So now I am doing something about it in the right direction. Goals for sure. But definitely after the 5 k the focus on a triathalon and more 5 ks to keep me focused.

So post run food.. Cheese quesadilla on a flour tortilla. It was fast and easy. I did not eat anything before the run so there is that. I need to learn how to ride a skate board.

The rest of my day watching Netflix and drinking coffee.


My 1st 5K count down..

Holy crappola. It is on May 19th. It is 3 weeks away. I am do not ready for this. I have not ran in a week. I did tonight on my lunch break. I did run for 25 mins straight. So that was awesome. There were also all sorts of people walking on the trail. Usually I start walking out of embarrassment. But not today… Another proud monent. So I decided after this 5 k I am going to start training for a sprint triatalon in oct. Yup total newbie here. I have not bikrd orvswam in literally 30 years. Ya go big or not at all. So I am going to cancel my gym and get a membership at the ymca because tbey have a pool. I got nothing. Oh ya i have to buy a bike and swim suit. Did I also mention that I am plus size… This is going to be interesting to say the least. But I have always wanted to do an Ironman. If JLo can do the Ironman well to hell with it.. So am I.

Oh and starting tommorow my nutrition plan starts. I know duh.. But i thought I was going to hurl from all the junk food I had eaten. Entertaining to say the least.

Did I Mention..

Ya.. I Officially give up on all if my goals, hopes, dreams, fitness, traveling, losing weight, finding a partner, friends,social life, acceptance or anything else. Geez this sucks. But looking back on all if my entrues wtc. I never accomplish anything. I start out and next day. Nope nothing. So I am going to wallow in this self acceptance and go from there to figure it out.